(623) 934-2722 shudson@aginginaz.com

When William first reached out, I immediately sensed he wanted to minimize his struggles. “Just need some help getting organized,” he had said. But his strained voice was a clear sign there was more beneath the surface.

My first visit confirmed my suspicions. The disarray in their home mirrored the chaos he was feeling inside. I met his wife, and immediately saw the effects of Alzheimer’s. She was quiet, unfocused, a stark contrast to the vivacious woman William described over the phone with a mix of fondness and grief.

William was overwhelmed, yet fiercely determined to handle everything himself. He was used to being the problem-solver, the one in control, and this disease was impossible to manage that way. His exhaustion was warring with his pride.

He was fixated on the practicalities of care – medications, appointments, household chores. Behind it all, I saw the emotional toll, the grief for the woman he was losing, the frustration with their new, heartbreaking reality.

We discussed bringing in help. He was reluctant at first – a mix of guilt and the fear of losing further control. But I explained how an in-home caregiver could ease his daily burden, freeing him up to focus on connecting with his wife, not just managing her care. We also arranged for a cleaning service, one less chore for him to worry about.

My role isn’t just about practical tasks; it’s about emotional support too. William needed a safe place to vent his frustrations, to voice his fears aloud without feeling like he was burdening his wife. He needed to know he wasn’t alone in this.

With some of the weight of daily care lifted, William found the space to refocus. He could enjoy those moments of connection with his wife that still existed. I helped him establish routines that allowed for simple pleasures – reading aloud, sharing a meal together. Sometimes, he’d see a glimmer of the woman he loved, and those moments fueled his resilience.

This journey is never easy. While William’s role will keep changing, he’s learning the importance of accepting help – not as a form of defeat, but as a path towards providing the best possible love and support for his ailing wife. That, in the end, is his biggest priority.

If you have been carrying the sole weight of caregiving and wondering if there is a better way, we can help. Every family, every patient and every caregiver are individuals, and your support systems should be created to meet your needs.